I came across this video, and just sobbed and sobbed. Its just beautiful! Definitely not alone, God is Good he’ll never forsake me nor forsake you— he is good always.
WOW- this song says it all!! On Monday the 28th I was heading back to Work and I decided to ask God to help me through my day. (back story: sorry LOL I’ve been trying to post a video of how I am doing, with my new camera- but have been way to busy to do so.. But I having been soso, extremely exhausted….. anything and everything has been wiping me OUT! well, This just so happens to be overly frustrating especially when you have a life… DUH right… all can relate. it’s just been a tough few weeks for me.) so back to what I was saying, That day I decided to pray and ask God to help me get through what I was feeling; I turn on the radio and right at that moment this song was blaring through my speakers. I have never heard this song before that moment. (If you have a second please listen to it. It’s a very relate-able song.)
Honestly this entire song stuck out to me. especially the part it say “I DON’T HAVE TO BE STRONG ENOUGH” It’s true, one of my friends is always telling me that same thing- I don’t have to be strong enough, God is. He will help me be strong enough!! it’s weird because I don’t get to emotional over songs, but this particular song made me pour tears as I was driving. If God is strong enough- why do I have such a hard time. Why would he pick me to go through such a tough time; First off I mean obviously I am a pretty well put together young lady (hahah), why give me a neurology issues. The first verse of the song it says “You must think I’m strong, to give me what I am going through” That right there seriously made me ball, I am not joking first 30 seconds of the song I was crying.. I do have a hard time just like everyone else- you may not see it because I am good at covering it up, but I do have very tough times. It all seem to play out fine though and I know i’ll be fine, somehow I find middle ground and keep going because I HAVE TO and because I WANT TO! :)
Well GOD I really do thank you, you’ve made me think beyond what I could imagine someone going through physically. The body is amazingly crazy… I know God knows I am strong enough; otherwise God wouldn’t of gave me this. Yes, Obviously I have my days where I am a complete mess…. and feel as if I can’t handle it. LITERALLY all the time!! We all have our trails we feel as if we aren’t ‘STRONG ENOUGH’ Just think you wouldn’t have been put in that situation if there wasn’t a plan for it or even if you weren’t STRONG ENOUGH. At the end of the song it starts singing one of my favorite verses in the bible Phil 4:13 ” I Can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength!” It was a crazy and powerful 4 mins of my life LOL. God can pop in; in unexpected times and tug at our hearts. It just shows how he loves us!
IT’S ALMOST MY 20th BIRTHDAY!!!! WOOHOO!!
ps. I love you all. and all you have to do it click on the title to get the video playing. :)
<3 If I say I love something so much… This would be my ANSWER! POOKIE I LOVE YOU! MEEEEEOW!
:) YAY for PROGRESS! <3 Praying!
Wow it’s Been sometime since the last time- I feel like a fibber. I keep saying I will try to blog more often then I actually do. I am so busy… well Kinda. :) The last time I posted it was a video about me going to a free clinic through a church- yeah that worked for sometime but, not what i needed. SO after I got the Nannying Job I have (best kids ever! <3) I decided it was time to get Kaiser. SO now I have insurance and I finally got to see a DR. I just recently got another MRI, I will hear back soon. My doc is also sending me to a neuro which YAY! i’m glad I didn’t have to force her to send me to one.
I don’t know, recently I feel Judged about my faith. I’ve been just having a hard time getting reconnected not only with community but, with God. I’ve been trying my best; trying to read more often, bible studies- at a home and woman’s group. SO it’s not like I am not trying to want God, I feel nothing. I have tried going to other churches a few times and it doesn’t feel right in my heart. (summit view feels like home.) it just sucks were I am at and I want God because I love him. I don’t know if I need something new or if this is something because I have been through a rough patch and kind of dropped of the face of the earth for a while and you know got disconnected. I really don’t want to feel like I am faking it. I want it to be real and true with God. These are just feeling I need to vent and get out. I understand too that it’s hard to keep connected when you are constantly tired and have weird thing happening to your body.. and it’s easy to slip from God. Or even Less trust because nothing is going right… I suppose.
:) Hi, decided to do a vid. I forgot to add, Please Pray for me! Not only for this nasty headache I have but for the upcoming Dr’s Appt. Thank you so much!!
Umm, I definitely haven’t done the video… I have been busy and Have had some issues come about! But, I think I am going to put it off for a few more weekends! In the mean time I may make a video A quick one… If I feel up to it.
I am either going to do that or Write some more… who knows… I never do… :) Bare with me! I shall be bloggin later tonight or tomorrow night!! I am just extremely Exhausted! :l mahhh.
Today is a headache day- a really bad headache day, one of those headaches you wake up with and can’t get rid of…… It’s so bad a want to cry. It gets worse if I get up out of bed! :o but, that’s where prayer comes in. I have not been feeling my best for the past few weeks So All the prayer I can get I would loveeee <3 I do appreciate it!
Ps. The silent words will come sometime this weekend!
Hi It’s Audrey! I have Been getting so bad at the blogging deal! and for all my blogger peeps I am so very sorry I haven’t been around lately.
I am here to tell you I am making a video and I am calling it silent words- because I am going to use either Q cards or a little white board thingy. :) Basically In the video I am going to say How I feel- because it’s hard for me to tell everyone I encounter I have neurology issues… and how it effects me day by day. Heck you may not even know! So this should explain it. Silent Words MEANS: I am SILENT…. un heard of right! haha! Surely. I am doing this to help me- to help you to help me. :D
and If that didn’t make sense Just pretend it did. i’m helping you to help me… enough said! brains going crazy!
Video shall be here ASAPish… :)
Life reminds me of a pair of glasses, that you can’t quite see through. Is this true?! I believe so it’s like looking through a pair of magnifying ‘elderly’ glasses. Blurry, and you can’t see clearly. This seem like my life right about now- why.. so you ask?! ha, if you really want to know my answer……. My answer is… Not enough JESUS. I believe Too busy with my crazy life that I pushed him aside like he was nothing like I didn’t need him…. I am CRAZY?! You may think ‘hell yeah!’ but, no I am human. and I hands down need him more and more every day! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cried this week alone.. If you truly know me you know I am a pretty sensitive`person let alone this neurology issue doesn’t help, actually if you didn’t know it makes it about 50x worse. My emotions are quite emotional so to say. I honestly will cry over the strangest things or over nothing. I’m crying just typing this.. Most of the time I don’t understand why these emotions come about, Obviously there could be multiple things.. but, I try not to worry about things like that too much. Any of you a future worrier?! Well you’re not alone… I know I definitely AM! I just want to point out it sucks, I don’t want to worry about the future That I hardly have control over. It’s hard Not to worry it’s so normal to- Especially health wise it’s kinda scary to think about… But, I know don’t need to worry cause God has a plan for my life! Funny thing is I’ve had so many people say too me “Audrey I love how worry free you are” I can’t help but to laugh to that!! because that’s so far from the truth. I’ve never ever met someone who doesn’t worry about at least ONE thing seriously though! (it’s human nature!)
Have you ever had that thought ’ if only you could be in my shoes for one day. you’ll know what it’s like.’ because I think that so much! although I don’t want anyone to experience this. But it’s just a thought. Just one day then you’ll know how I feel day to day- I’ll even give you a pretty good day. :D I just want people to understand how others may feel even if they look amazing on the outside- honestly on the inside they probably feel Shitty, and they just can’t tell you how they really feel rather they say i’m alright <- that right there is a defense mechanisms. :) I wish I could explain how My body feels to people so they understand a little, it sucks because I don’t even understand it myself.
I pray that, I may get insurance so Hopefully I get answers soon, then there will be a lot more understanding to this! :) It’s tough. sometimes I feel like I can’t be a teenager. But, I try my best to live my life at the fullest!
Prayers if you have any of course I would love to pray for you!!
for me pray that I get A lot more JESUS time! & for less worrying, for insurance and answers- Everything is Harder with out answers! :) Love love love loveloveovleoevoelveovelvelove you! XOXO